Friday, March 19, 2010

Hilarious Guest Post from Author Brian O'Mara-Croft

Okay readers...we have a guest post today from the hilarious author of 'Lost In The Hive.'

I'm giving you fair warning though, you should put down any drinks BEFORE reading this guest post! I managed to spit a mouth full of energy drink all over my computer screen when I started reading!
His guest post includes a variety of topics: blogging, writing, appearance, and...hating me. *wink*
So let's give Brian a big welcome and see what he has to say...
Wow—my first-ever guest stint on someone else’s blog. I should be better-dressed for the occasion. I could use a haircut—or at least a hair brush. But here I sit in my bathrobe, with my bed-head, on the edge of the mattress responsible for the unkempt condition of said head.

Good morning.

Lots of followers here. I’m jealous. What does Kris have that I don’t? Maybe she brushes her hair. Maybe she gets dressed. Maybe ‘Cajun Book Ladies’ are more interesting than me. I should call myself the ‘Midwest Book Dude’. Yeah, that’ll do it. I’ll get dressed, brush my hair—no, I’ll shower, get dressed, and brush my hair—and then I’ll be the best Midwest Book Dude the world has ever known. Then Kris will be jealous of me.

Kris has a catchy phrase for her blog: “Life is Just a Bowl of Cherries”. I hate it. Okay, I love it, but I hate how clever it is, and I’m seething about not having a catchy phrase. So I hate it. I should come up with a catchy phrase for my blog (

I come up with ideas:

“Life is Just the Space Between Now and My Next Cocktail” (wrong first impression?)

“Life—Wow Does It Ever Suck Sometimes” (not sunny enough?)

“Life: What Happens if You’re a Writer and You’re not J.K. Rowling.” (too bitter?)

Oh, screw it! I’ll get by without a catchy phrase. My handful of followers will love me in spite of this. They will love me, won’t they? They’ll buy my book, right? Maybe one or two will buy it for their friends?

“Hey, Joan, here’s that book I was telling you about. Check out the author photo—wow, that hair! Is that a bathrobe?”

I should add a catchy phrase to my book cover. That’s just what I’ll do. Wait…is that a hair on my ear?

This blog looks really nice. Makes me think of wallpaper. Remember wallpaper? I hate it. Okay, I love it, but I hate that my blog doesn’t look as nice. My book looks cool, though, so who cares if my blog doesn’t look nice?

I’m starting to care.

I know just what to do: take a shower, get dressed, brush my hair, come up with a catchy phrase, wallpaper my blog and stop hating everything.

Or maybe I’ll just go back to bed.
Brian O’Mara-Croft is the author of Lost in the Hive, a collection of humorous essays to be released by PublishingWorks in June, 2010. You should buy it so Brian doesn’t hate everything anymore. To keep up with Brian’s latest, become a Facebook fan at It’s not pretty, but it’s fun, and fans will soon have a chance to win Brian’s book.


  1. Sorry Brian...I'm going to have to steal the phrase "Life is Just the Space Between Now and My Next Cocktail” who cares about first impressions when there's a cocktail waiting :)

    Great post!

  2. Life is just a bowl of cherries, better off if stoned.. After all it is nearly beer o'cclock, Great chat thanks for sharing

  3. Storyheart--"nearly" beer o'clock? It's 11:11 am where I am. Why wait?

  4. Now, Brian, an eternal pessimist like myself appreciates what you have to say; though I really did think that your first catch phrase was “Life is Just the Space Between Now and My Next Cockroach". You know, I was thinking bee, roach, they're both insects, right?

    Seriously, this is a great post. Now you need to tell me what your book is about--or should I not ask that question on a Friday?

    Best of luck with your book!


  5. Cheryl--"Lost in the Hive" is a collection of humorous real-life essays about my successes and failings as a husband, father, son, brother and man. Lots of fun! Think of David Sedaris, but with a harder edge. Thanks for asking!

  6. This is the most hilarious and original guest post I have read in all the days I've been hosting authors...already I love this guy just because of his post!

  7. Oops, forgot...I'm going to bookmark this to show my authors how to write a really great guest post!

  8. Sounds like a great book. Oh, and IMO, showering is a MUST. ;)

  9. LOL sounds like a great book. I vote for Life: What Happens if You’re a Writer and You’re not J.K. Rowling.

  10. I'm jealous too. I need to think up a catchy phrase.

    Morgan Mandel

  11. Thanks, everyone, for your feedback. I'm blushing (not a good look for me).

  12. So, I thought to myself, if this guy can come up with such a creative post, I should check out his blog. As I anticipated, very entertaining and humorous! Looking forward to picking up your book in June, Brian.